The Song Diary II

by Paleo

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credits

released April 16, 2017

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Track Name: 20170416 - Sunday Prayer, ccclxxix
Time & time again, within my diary of dreams,
there is a scene I keep coming back to
of the crime where I kept looking past you
to see who next while walking by
might walk into my shrinking life.
This quiet crime made me your hallway too –
a hollow thing you walked through,
i am. i am.

But time & time again has a way of bending darkness
for the few willing to wait,
those who stand upon the coals of shame
and cry until it’s cool. I know now I was a fool,
but i can’t erase the past. But I can be a better man.
I am. I am.

But you're a birthday, deep with the dayshine.
From dusk to moonbreak, the dust of keepsakes.

Time & time again, I am. I am.
Track Name: 20170417 - Common Denominator
Of all the stupid schmucks here getting drunk you asked me
over a vodka, ginger ale, with a little lime and grenadine
to identify the line where love is no longer worth fighting for,
like a sign lighting up red in the dark over the door.
Well, I say woe to those arriving in such armor to the dance.
Heavy are the arms there holding weapons in their hands.
It’s hard to feel somebody’s heart through a bullet proof vest,
so if it’s come to this before with others, I’d suggest

It’s true.
You
are the common denominator.
It’s true.
You
are the common denominator.
It’s true.
You
are the common denominator.
It’s true.
You
are the common denominator.

But I’m not saying that to gaslight you; don’t take it all yourself –
the back and forth, the wave the sand, the swinging of the bell.
It’s you or them, or a bit of both. Knowing only goes so far.
You are you, and they are they, and I’m some idiot at the bar
where the drinks no longer serve you, and the place will always close,
and like tipsy trees dropping their leaves so too we drop our clothes.
We are one hundred percent responsible only for getting it through our brain
that everything is just exactly what you make of how you’re made.

It’s true.
You
are the common denominator.
It’s true.
You
are the common denominator.
It’s true.
You
are the common denominator.
It’s true.
You
are the common denominator.
Track Name: 20170418 - Ophidiophilia
You like snakes.
You like snakes
because their poison is a strength.
And I'm no saint.
I'm a gambler
looking for a flashy machine to put my coins in at length.

Holy shit.
Holy shit.
Holy shit.
I’m in love again.
Will I kill this person?
Will I kill this person?

Some people want beauty, some are looking for a free ride.
But that’s a little less light than I need to really read by.
The teeth of the key to the city inside you
broke off in the lock of all those who have tried you.
You thought I was supposed to be following you,
and I said you should follow me.
So we made all different turns and I lost you
in the waste of the moon beams.
We touch just to touch. We drive just to drive.
We hurt just to hurt to remind us we’re alive.
I’d been feening for this feeling. I’m a freak. A tweaker
with you in my veins. When I walk the sky creaks,
and someday I’ll fall like the rain
when the pain comes,
when the pain comes.

You like snakes.
You like snakes,
because their poison is a strength.
Because their poison is a strength.
Track Name: 20170419 - Star Dust
You’re star dust,
so they say.
Dust is old and cold,

and stars burn,
and never learn,
and no one gets too close.

Though you feel your flower fading,
still you gotta wait. You know there's
someone down the road...
down the road.

And you’ll never know
unless you go.
Stardust there they are.

Though you feel your flower fading,
still you gotta wait. You know there's
someone down the road...
down the road.

You lovers are the living coal
that keeps the machine moving,
and you get pushed. You get pulled
and crushed into diamond.
Track Name: 20170420 - Golden
In the beginning we were golden
from the first moment our little eyes open.
Somewhere that peace got stolen.
We had hearts; someone put a hole in.
Maybe our folks who were always fighting?
Seeing them smile was like a Loch Ness sighting.
Or they were drunk. Or watching the TV,
on the lookout for a way out that’s easy.
Now you’re giving them hell. You’ve broken the spell.
You figure if they couldn’t take it, oh well.
You bought their BS; now you’re ready to sell.
But little by little you became them yourself.
You put your conscience in stealth mode,
saying yes when you should’ve said no.
You were a rock; now you are a pebble
trying to feel more than should ever be felt.
You think that love is what you’re missing?
You think a hug and a little kissing
is gonna fix you? It’s gonna nix you.
You’re the one who always tricks you
But we could be golden again, like a lion’s mane,
put all our darkness on airplane.
Pick up with your left what your right threw away –
not in a year, a week, not tomorrow, today.
Track Name: 20170421 - Dial It Down
So life or death.
All the time bombs.
All the wasted breath,
the high drama.

We dialed it,
dialed it,
dialed it,
dialed it
down.

We read the book
of empty pages.
We rode the spin.
We watered the mazes

I remember all
the locks throbbing,
the long boughs of
our bodies bobbing.

We dialed it,
dialed it,
dialed it,
dialed it
down

to nothing.

We know the number;
now why don’t we dial it up?

We were both wrong,
let’s look it up.
Track Name: 20170422 - Blood In The Clouds
A little love with little bones in his hands
stole the stone from your heart.
You were his daddy
until the magical man in the magical mirror
told you what you wanted to hear,
and you disappeared
into picture frames they kept in closets
and one christmas card and a monthly deposit.

They said you were blood in the clouds crazy.
You became just a name never spoken out loud.
Crazy.
Crazy.

I wish on the stars that we’re not the same,
the stars that are closer than you ever came
in your boat made of matches in your river of flame,
magical man in your mirror of shame.

They said you were blood in the clouds crazy.
You became just a name never spoken out loud.
Crazy.
Crazy.
Track Name: 20170423 - Sunday Prayer, ccclxxx
Time & time again,
close your eyes. Ignore the warnings,
even as coastlines of your joys draw closed,
like deep blue blinds on windows
soak the rooms we share in shadow.
Try as we might to let the bad go,
it’s the ink with which we write
the streetlit stories of our lives.
I am, I am.

Time & time again,
where do you work? Where are you broken
like the white wing of your bedroom door,
kicked open once then closed no more.
I believed when I was young
what’s spoken by those Trojan tongues.
And jumped off fearless more than once
the bridge on which my heart is strung,
I am, I am.

But you’re a birthday, deep with the dayshine.
From dusk to moonbreak, the dust of keepsakes.

Time & time again, I am. I am.
Track Name: 20170424 - Sweet Nothings
Ask forgiveness,
not permission.
To words of wisdom
i won’t listen.
Just read my mind.
My eyes glisten
with pretty tears.
Here’s your mission:

Whisper.
Whisper me
sweet, sweet nothings,
sweet, sweet nothings,
nothings.

Hear my heart.
Start with silence.
Explanations are
a kind of violence.
Just hold me close
when the trial ends.
i don’t need choirs
or violins.

Just whisper.
Whisper me
sweet, sweet nothings,
sweet, sweet nothings,
nothings.

Sweet, sweet nothings.
Track Name: 20170425 - The Abalone
Ashing in the abalone, learning to play dominoes,
we’re smoke and mirrors and animals disappearing as we close
the telescope of time around the table where we lay the bones
and turn off our phones.

The walls are hosting hoola hoops and groups of paper lightning bolts
cut out from retro porno mags a picture worth a thousand volts,
and through the blinds the streetlights white as sails on distant sailboats
in a frozen moat.

We’re not M.C. Escher’s picture of the hand drawing the hand.
We are mansions wishing we were castles made of sand,
three beasts of burden with no brand, no man to tell us where to stand
when they go dancing.

Would you rather fly or walk through walls or be invisible,
be rich or smart or strong or loved or just plain irresistible?
I used to say that death was best as far as superpowers go –
the abyss bestows.

But I’m glad to be alive even when tears claw at my eyes,
even when holes grow in the stolen suit of me, my much too-small disguise,
even when the lions and lionesses of my pride
go into hiding.

The day drinks up the night and the night pours out the day,
erasing and revising like the tide does with a wave.
Hello, goodbye, they’re both the same. We’re never close or far away,
We’re just waiting.

Don’t wait for me.
Don’t wait for me.
Track Name: 20170426 - Our Damage
The binding spells
of a thousand hells,
once you’re in
your can never go.

My damage will
get in your blood
and speed it up
and make you gold.

I climb inside your electric eyes to feel
something that is furiously real.
What if my love could heal you;
what if it could heal me too?
what if it could heal me too?

& your damage cut me
like I was a drug
into fine lines
under long shadows,

like frozen grass,
the trails of aircraft
in your blue skies
in snow-white rows.

I climb inside your electric eyes to feel
something that is furiously real.
What if my love could heal you;
what if it could heal me too?
what if it could heal me too?
what if it could heal me too?
what if it could heal me too?
Track Name: 20170427 - Underneath It All
The bones of lightning fold
the angel hopes you hold
for your dreams to tremble true
They don't make time for you
Like I do

The ghosts who broke in half
my heart still haunt my past
Like ash as the fire grew
They don't make time for you
Like I do

Underneath it all
Underneath it all
Underneath it all
Underneath it all

The center of the shroud
That blooms all through this town
Drowned gowns to suffer through
They don't make time for you
Like I do

And rising from the wires
on the roof of bad luck's spires
the galactic static blues
They don't make time for you
Like I do

Underneath it all
Underneath it all
Underneath it all
Underneath it all

Be good to you
Be good to me
Track Name: 20170428 - Blown Up Jet Fighters
If you move in secret hidden hulls,
you can’t cut through a fight with a knife too dull.
If you’re playing hard but you got no strings,
the folks you love won’t hear anything.

Burned books,
and piles of typewriters,
and old computers,
and blown up jet fighters,
and cracked tablets,
and rotary phones,
that’s where we all go.
That is our home.

The rivers shrivel. The garden gets wild.
The ladders of bones collapse into piles.
Walk away from the mirror and be erased,
be the bare walls that scale the staircase.

Burned books,
and piles of typewriters,
and old computers,
and blown up jet fighters,
and cracked tablets,
and rotary phones,
that’s where we all go.
That is our home.

There is no raincoat for what’s coming down.
The true blue fire is once more coming around.
The unforgettable hooks that never made it to the boat,
that tore themselves free and died, but still float.


Burned books,
and piles of typewriters,
and old computers,
and blown up jet fighters,
and cracked tablets,
and rotary phones,
that’s where we all go.
That is our home.
That is our home.
Track Name: 20170429 - The Dead Don't Dream
The evening's ending.
The taxis slowly pulling up
Like light bending
Toward the black hole in my empty cup

The dead don't dream we're here.
There's nothing to fear.
The dead don't dream we're here.
There's nothing to fear.

I'll show you power
unfold your grave and golden throne
crown me in flowers
and tie my spirit to the stone

The dead don't dream we're here.
There's nothing to fear.
The dead don't dream we're here.
There's nothing to fear.

The tail lights blurring
with no why or where or whence
The reverse purring
of language's electric fence

The dead don't dream we're here.
There's nothing to fear.
The dead don't dream we're here.
There's nothing to fear.

I'll show you power
Change this grain of sand into pearl
Bury this tower
In rose petals in impossible swirl

The dead don't dream we're here.
There's nothing to fear.
The dead don't dream we're here.
There's nothing to fear.

The dead don't dream we're here.
There's nothing to fear.
The dead don't dream we're here.
There's nothing to fear.
Track Name: 20170430 - Sunday Prayer, ccclxxxi
Time & time again,
verily your friends will disappoint you,
like cats walking on your keyboard.
We are teams of children playing war
with cardboard swords. On metal wings,
flying between these bolts of lightning,
were she a bird, it would be of prey.
Were she your pet, it would be a stray.
I am. I am.

Time & time again,
if you play fifty-two card pickup
with other people’s feelings, you’ll stop
getting asked to do the dealing.
Still, it’s the same old song and dance,
and you saw it coming a mile away.
That’s how friendship and romance go
with a wild bird of prey.
I am. I am

But you’re a birthday deep with the dayshine.
From dusk to moonbreak, the dust of keepsakes.

Time & time again, I am. I am.
Track Name: 20170501 - Woman Of Your Word
Angel,
you fell from grace
to this strange hell
with no flame
with no flame –

just people
who take aim
through peep holes.
Bombs away!
Bombs away!
Bombs away!

Quiet as a rose,
you’re a woman of your word.
Dropped from the sky,
it's just seed in the dirt.
Nobody move and
nobody gets hurt.
You want what you want,
and you’re a woman of your word.

Angel,
you fell from grace
to this strange hell.
We’re the same.
We’re the same.

Give me danger,
just a taste,
angel.
Bombs away!
Bombs away!
Bombs away!

Quiet as a rose,
you’re a woman of your word.
Dropped from the sky,
it's just seed in the dirt.
Nobody move and
nobody gets hurt.
You want what you want,
and you’re a woman of your word.
Track Name: 20170502 - Namaste?
Namaste?
Where’s the hole where you threw my heart away?
How evolved of you to smile and say,
"namaste."

Give me all the dreamcatchers and crystals in the world
covered in candle wax in the glow of rainbow light bulbs.
Give me all the starling feather earrings ever worn,
and burn it all. When did your headband become a blindfold?

You hated the wind.
I used to hold my coat out like wings and tell you to get in.
I remember your eyes were so green,
then for awhile they were yellow, and then they were red, finally.

Namaste?
I wanted so bad to see you, but why today?
Why would you shake my hand and file me away?
What’s it solve for you to smile and say,
"namaste"?

Give me all the dreamcatchers and crystals in the world
covered in candle wax in the glow of rainbow light bulbs.
Give me all the starling feather earrings ever worn,
and burn it all. When did your headband become a blindfold?

Was it all just a dream,
some kind of commercial trying to sell you what you don’t need?

Namaste?
Where’s the hole where you threw my heart away?
How evolved of you to smile and say,
"namaste."
Track Name: 20170503 - Tears (Falling Everywhere)
There’s tears
falling everywhere.
They pour.
They pour.

There’s tears
falling everywhere.
They pour.
They pour,

and nobody hears;
it’s a nightmare,
and more,
and more.

The man in the top floor of the tower
has all the power.
Watered by blood, all his metal flowers.
This is his hour.

There’s tears
falling everywhere.
They pour.
They pour,

and nobody hears;
it’s a nightmare,
and more,
and more.

100-stories tall, and they’re true, every one.
We are the gun,
and his is the finger that’s getting it done.
He already won.

Tears.
Tears.
Tears.
Tears.
Track Name: 20170504 - The Fox and The Hummingbird
There once was a fox who sat on a stone
who cried as the animals wouldn’t leave him alone.
The crow came along saying don’t feel so bad.
The big brown bear said you ought to be glad.
It was only the hummingbird that didn’t mind the pouting,
for she was thirsty, and the fox was a fountain.
"Sob me a story I can take to the bank."
So the fox kept crying, and the hummingbird drank.

That’s making love, minus the making,
minus the love, and it’s yours for the taking.

So Viva my miracle, if ever you find
yourself on the stone, keep this in mind.
It’ll hurt like hell, but it ain’t gonna kill ya
And you might learn something, and at first it’ll thrill ya.
But it ain’t love if it’s pain, the two aren’t the same,
and those you say different are playing a game.
And games can be fun, even when you lose,
so don’t be afraid, just know what you choose:

That’s making love, minus the making,
minus the love, and it’s yours for the taking.
Track Name: 20170505 - Skin To Skeleton
The movie ain't over,
but Amy's ready to leave.
I got dropped off;
your truck don't have the seats,
so let her sit up front.
You two go on ahead.
I'm gonna stay;
I want to see the end.

From skin to skeleton,
how does all this end,
past screens and curtains,
enemies and best friends.

From skin to skeleton,
how does all this end,
past screens and curtains,
enemies and best friends.

& I walked by the dark horse after,
but I didn’t go in.
Out in this same rain,
people getting pinned.
Fireworks light even
in weather like this.
Nothing sparks in water
better than a kiss.

From skin to skeleton,
how does all this end,
past screens and curtains,
enemies and best friends.

From skin to skeleton,
how does all this end,
past screens and curtains,
enemies and best friends.

When I opened my eyes,
Amy was on the edge of the bed,
wearing the same clothes from the night before
talking about the end.
All the shapes a flame makes
as it flickers in the fuel.
Love doesn’t want to hurt you,
it’s time that is cruel.

From skin to skeleton,
how does all this end,
past screens and curtains,
enemies and best friends.

From skin to skeleton,
how does all this end,
past screens and curtains,
enemies and best friends.
Track Name: 20170506 - For John
You would lay like a city unmoving when you're sleeping
with only the blood and thoughts and dreams still streaking 
like headlights in black and white poster photographs.
And in the morning sometimes when I'd come in you'd laugh
from the floor where you'd rolled to after I'd gone
and couldn't reach your phone to tell me something was wrong.
How many times John have you laughed from the floor
among all us toy soldiers who pretend our life is a war?
We quit jobs because they're hard, and quit love and quit friends
and drink to become children and feel helpless again.

John, I’m sorry I quit.
John, I did give a shit,
I really did.
I really did.
I really did.

Your legs were thin as the bars on a cage.
No one should feel that trapped. It’s impossible to gauge
how strong you must be, in some ways you’re more than whole.
The rest of us, well, we’re just on cruise control.
I heard after I quit, someone locked your wheels
on the porch so you could sit in the sun with your meal,
and you wanted to smoke, so they lit the match,
and they left to make a phone call, and it dropped in your lap,
and they couldn’t hear you when it started to burn.
I’m glad you didn’t die. I guess it wasn’t your turn

John, I’m sorry I quit.
John, I did give a shit,
I really did.
I really did.
I really did.
Track Name: 20170507 - Sunday Prayer, ccclxxxii
Time & time again,
it goes by faster the second go round.
The things which used to splinter
in our memories now don't break the skin, for
we are remade with age with a metal
that doesn't bend, watchmen over a settled
night, when the concrete like mist stretched tight
in all directions the roofs kissed with moonlight.
I am, I am.

Time & time again,
but still my heart beats in the safe
even ever so quietly as the tumblers
I wait for the one who knows the numbers
to press her palms to my eye sockets
until stars burst in that darkness
and remain there faintly glowin'
even once my eyes are open.
I am, I am.

But you're a birthday, deep with the dayshine.
From dusk to moonbreak, the dust of keepsakes.

Time & time again, I am. I am.
Track Name: 20170508 - Blood Bank
i know some crazy
miserable liars,
but don’t be a blood bank to vampires.
And I know your reasons,
and they’re pretty good,
but Mr. Rogers, you're in the wrong hood.

Our two islands probably touch
if you go down deep enough.
I'll cheers to your sickness as well as your health,
just keep your coffin somewhere else.

They’re like a mood ring,
the color don’t change.
The world is their book you’re just a page.
And they got you dog-eared;
you're person who pays
attention to people who do nothing but complain.

Our two islands probably touch
if you go down deep enough.
I'll cheers to your sickness as well as your health,
just keep your coffin somewhere else.

You're climbing up barbed wire;
you gotta be tired.
Don't be a blood bank to vampires.
Don't be a blood bank to vampires.
Don't be a blood bank to vampires.
Don't be a blood bank to vampires.
Track Name: 20170509 - My Friends Who Sit At The Bar
I told my friends who sit at the bar,
"we should all have our own show!"
We’re just the kind of people who’d be big stars,
the kind you love more the less you know.

There’s the Plain Jane and the Mary Sue
and the Brooding Rebel between the two.
Then there’s the Old Deadbeat with the heart of gold,
and his Libertine Son with his nose in his phone.

And then there’s me, The Lonely One.
And then there’s me, The Lonely One.

The audience sighs as the credits roll by,
and the actors go back to their real lives,
but we stay right here night after night...

Here comes The Pixie with the troubled past,
with The Nice Guy who always finished last.
She talks about darkness, cue the audience to laugh.
He dreams someday she’ll be his better half.

And then there’s me, The Lonely One.
And then there’s me, The Lonely One.

The audience sighs as the credits roll by,
and the actors go back to their real lives,
but we stay right here night after night...
Track Name: 20170510 - Where We Go When We Die
Where do we go when we die?
First, to a long and well-lit hall
with unlocked cabinets full of all our long
lost things, big and small:

Rings, keys, gloves and glasses,
trains of thought, touch, the massive
list goes on and on and on.

On and on and
on and on and on and on and on.

Next, a long procession
of all the people you never got to meet,
because you were scared to say hi, or ask their name twice,
or you just sat in the wrong seat:

Allies, wives, rivals, lovers,
friends, bosses, and blood brothers,
the list goes on and on and on.

On and on and
on and on and on and on and on.

And last there’s a door for everything
you ever said no to or didn’t try.
Behind it you can go and see what would have happened,
good or bad, what it would have been like:

Eyes, rides, parties and prayer,
a job, a drink, a drug, despair,
the list goes on and on and on.

On and on and
on and on and on and on and on.

Where do we go when we die?
Nowhere possibly;
so try to get it right the first time.
That’s my philosophy.
Track Name: 20170511 - Songs Are For The Birds
The city wears the streets like a tight striped dress.
It’s impossible not to look, but I don’t to stare like the rest.
I go slow, and I take the turns gently.
I try not to lend away lightly what gravely was lent me.

But actions speak louder than words,
and songs are for the birds,
so if you love me don’t let me know,
let it show.
If you love me don’t let me know,
let it show.

I don’t follow into woods after my hound bewitched –
there where the path forks, and the signs are switched –
or else I arrive on my own doorstep a child unclaimed,
small as violin, with a question mark for a name.

But actions speak louder than words,
and songs are for the birds,
so if you love me don’t let me know,
let it show.
If you love me don’t let me know,
let it show.

I got high and went to Walmart and walked from aisle to aisle.
Everyone here is on something. It’s an army of exiles.
I hear there’s an island of trash made of plastic in the ocean,
like a hole in all our heads, and it’s growing.

But actions speak louder than words,
and songs are for the birds,
so if you love me don’t let me know,
let it show.
If you love me don’t let me know,
let it show.
Track Name: 20170512 - Walls Down
Love, now I found you.
I take all my walls down.
I take all my walls down.
I take all my walls down.

And gladly I lay down my knives.
My hands are so tired from holding them tight.
Gladly I lay down my life.

Love, now I found you.
I take all my walls down.
I take all my walls down.
I take all my walls down.

And gladly I lay down my knives.
My hands are so tired from holding them tight.
Gladly I lay down my life.

Walk with me.
Talk with me.
Lay with me.
Stay with me.

Love, now I found you.
I take all my walls down.
I take all my walls down.
I take all my walls down.

And gladly I lay down my knives.
My hands are so tired from holding them tight.
Gladly I lay down my life.
Track Name: 20170513 - The Skull Maraca
The skull maraca
filled with dreams and teeth
and chariots and caca
and fake dead flower wreaths.

The beat breaks. The heart quakes.
I shake before you

the skull maraca
filled with memories
mad dashed on the rocks of
time’s slow striptease.

The beat breaks. The heart quakes.
I shake before you
the skull maraca

shellacked in bloody pages
that could not to Rorschach you,
my smallest of cages.

The beat breaks. The heart quakes.
I shake before you

the skull maraca.
The skull maraca.
Track Name: 20170514 - Sunday Prayer, ccclxxxiii
Time & time again,
mama I know when your power went out
how dark it got for you when we
stopped being your babies.
That love is electric, isn’t it?
And somehow worth all the shit,
literally. And afterwards the candle
of just you is too small to handle.
I am, I am.

Time & time again,
And you know mama I made a baby too,
but I still don’t really know what you went through.
I used to think my turn would be like you
and dad: a partner, a house, some pets;
in some ways it was all as good as it gets.
But I know deep down it was really hard.
There’s more to life than a nice back yard.
I am, I am.

But you’re a birthday, deep with the dayshine.
From dusk to moon break, the dust of keepsakes.
Track Name: 20170515 - Where It's Bound I Go
I want to fly.
I want to sing.
But underwater,
what good are wings?
In every gutter
the wine flows,
and where it’s bound
I go.

Are you the moon?
Am I a cloud?
What is this wind
all about
that pushes me to you,
this invisible ghost?
Where it’s bound
I go.

What a dream
we could be,
if only our minds
would let us sleep.
And where the dream would take us
I don’t know,
but where it’s bound
I go.

I want to love.
I want to touch.
But my hands
turn to dust.
You looking for me?
Follow the smoke.
Where it’s bound
I go.
Where it’s bound
I go.
Track Name: 20170516 - The Buried Man
The buried man who like a nail goes in
and disappears with intention
wears the earth like a cloak.
It was just after dawn when I woke up.
The paper moon lamp we never turned off
shrunken in the bloom of daylight's soft
glory, as it piece by piece paints
your room, your things, your arms, your face.

Put your flowers on me.
Lay your flowers on me.
Put your flowers on me.
Lay your flowers on me.

For a minute like that I watched you,
the blankets braided beige and blue
like snakes you'd wrestled til dead.
I thought I might kiss you, but left instead
and sunk myself into my day
like a shovel. To stay away
from love is impossible. It's like
I'm a moth and you're the brightest light
on the block. But if I could bury
myself in myself, like you in those carrion
snakes, there would still be my stone
you could come and talk to when you felt alone.

Put your flowers on me.
Lay your flowers on me.
Put your flowers on me.
Lay your flowers on me.
Track Name: 20170517 - Walking Backwards (Life Raft)
I am walking backwards.
When i’m by your side
I am going back in time through my life
to when I was the blackbird
waiting in the song.
There was nothing wrong with my wings all along.

Nothing broke that a smile can’t fix,
yours always does the trick.
Nothing sunk that won’t lift with a laugh.
Be my be my be my be my be my be my be my be my
Be my be my be my be my be my be my be my be my
life raft,
life raft.

I am walking backwards.
When i’m by your side
I am going back in time through my life
to when all that mattered
was all the joy
I felt all around when I was just a boy.

Nothing broke that a smile can’t fix,
yours always does the trick.
Nothing sunk that won’t lift with a laugh.
Be my be my be my be my be my be my be my be my
Be my be my be my be my be my be my be my be my
life raft,
life raft.

I am walking backwards.
When i’m by your side
I am going back in time through my life
to when I was the master
of being young,
and happiness was my mother tongue.

Nothing broke that a smile can’t fix,
yours always does the trick.
Nothing sunk that won’t lift with a laugh.
Be my be my be my be my be my be my be my be my
Be my be my be my be my be my be my be my be my
life raft,
life raft.
Track Name: 20170518 - Space
You want space.
You think that you will bloom
with a little room,
like dust from a broom.

Space.
Space.
Space.

In the afternoon,
you wanna be the moon.
Be the snow in June
while I sink like a lotus.
Oh, what I would not
give for you to notice

All that I’m carrying.
All that I’m carrying.
All that I’m carrying.
All that I’m carrying.

You want space.
You think it’s full of stars,
all of heaven’s scars.
Reach your arms through the bars.

Space.
Space.
Space.

Wear a bigger suit.
Be a hole you shoot
to feel the rain through the roof
while I sink like a lotus.
Oh, what I would not
give for you to notice

All that I’m carrying.
All that I’m carrying.
All that I’m carrying.
All that I’m carrying.

Am I light covered in darkness, or darkness covered in light?
Is a rose a rose when it’s covered in dog piss? I never get anything right.

All that I’m carrying.
All that I’m carrying.
All that I’m carrying.
All that I’m carrying.
Track Name: 20170519 - One Of These Days
I have no fear of winning,
of putting my finger in the mouth
of the game that ate your quarter.
I’ll burn this arcade down.

One of these days, you’ll get out of this town,
and I’ll still be here, holding it down.

I have no fear of fighting.
I’d drink a cup of tears.
If the crowd is getting hungry,
you bleed to get their cheers.

One of these days, you’ll get out of this town,
and I’ll still be here, holding it down.

I have no fear of dying.
The angels keep their receipts.
They can take me back whenever,
and judge me by my deeds.

One of these days, you’ll get out of this town,
and I’ll still be here, holding it down.

There are no tests that matter.
I’m not afraid fail.
I am no crazy captain.
There is no white whale

One of these days, you’ll get out of this town,
and I’ll still be here, holding it down.

I have no fear of loving.
I’ll fire into that smoke
and hope that I hit something
that can take a joke.

One of these days, you’ll get out of this town,
and I’ll still be here, holding it down.
Track Name: 20170520 - What I Think I Need
I don’t need the rich to bow.
They’ll get theirs someday anyhow.
I don’t need the American dream.
I’m fine being on the losing team.
I don’t want the world to burn.
I need this thing to turn to turn.
I don’t need another try.
Someone already got it right.
I don’t need the sun to shine.
I’m fine with rain most of the time.
I don’t need the crowd to hush.
Let them chatter if they must.
I don’t need quiet and peace.
I don’t need to call the police.

For right now at least
what I think I need is
you.

I don’t need to settle any scores
in a holier than thou sort of war.
I don’t need the bad guy to pay.
Let that dog have its day.
I don’t need to know the truth,
to see inside the wizard’s booth.
I don’t need fortune & fame.
What really matters stays the same.
I don’t need you to be true.
I’ll be me and you be you.
I don’t need to travel around.
The sky is the sky. Ground is ground.
I don’t need to know myself.
I can play the hand I’m delt.

For right now at least
what I think I need is
you.
You.
Track Name: 20170521 - Sunday Prayer, ccclxxxiv
Time & time again,
I think of life now like a woods
where there cannot be space for all.
To save a pine, a birch should fall.
To drink, don’t overpour the cup.
One has to go for another to come up,
or you’ll find both your flowers dead,
replaced by insects in your head,
I am, I am.

But time & time again,
the mistake some of us make is thinking
we are smart enough to have it both ways.
We can cross the river and not pay.
But the thing that sits and never speaks
but rows and knows the boat will leak
laughs at you like he laughed at me
and takes you not across but far downstream.
I am, I am.

And you're a birthday deep with the dayshine.
From dusk to moonbreak, the dust of keepsakes.

Time & time again, I am. I am.
Track Name: 20170522 - Woman'd Be Stronger
At the end of the night
when the day’s been a fight,
I need something stout
to knock me out.
And sometimes the sheep
need a field of good green
before I go down
for the count.

But a woman’d be stronger
A woman’d be stronger.
A woman’d be stronger.
I know.
I know.

And in the middle of the day
when things don’t go my way,
and I can’t let it go,
deep down I know
what the whole world must know
when they look at all those
balanced on the flagpoles
roleplaying control.

But a woman’d be stronger
A woman’d be stronger.
A woman’d be stronger.
I know.
I know.

Walls keep you in,
but that’s not real medicine.
I know at least for me
what sets me free.
When a man lets his scars
put him behind some bars,
it’ll take more than steel
to help him to heal.

But a woman’d be stronger
A woman’d be stronger.
A woman’d be stronger.
I know.
I know.

But a woman’d be stronger
A woman’d be stronger.
A woman’d be stronger.
I know.
I know.
Track Name: 20170523 - The Difference
Is my heart gold,
or is it coal?
Am I young,
or am I old?

I can’t tell the difference.

Am I lost,
or am I home?
Am I in love,
or am I alone?

I can’t tell the difference.

Should I go,
or should I stay?
Is it too soon,
or is it too late?

I can’t tell the difference.

Am I half-written,
or half-erased?
Are you the way through,
or are you the maze?

I can’t tell the difference.
Track Name: 20170524 - The Devil's Party
The Devil had a party when God had a Son.
He said, "congratulations, buddy!
Looks like you won.
Finally, I'm gonna get something done.

The Devil had a party when God had a Son.
"Coo chee coo chee coo, cutie pie.
You and I
are gonna have some fun."

You get the invite with directions to the house.
It says once you’re in you’re in and you’re never getting out.
There are three doors, it says, and you will have to choose.
Depending on how look at it, no matter what you win or lose.

Behind door number 1... the Devil!
Behind door number 3... the Devil!
Behind door number 2... You-Know-Who!

The Devil had a party when God had a Son.
Everybody put on your dancing shoes.
Show him your moves.
He'll play the drum.

The Devil had a party when God had a son.
Everyone is gonna be there
or be square. The killers and the cops.
The lecher and the nun.

Behind door number 1... the Devil!
Behind door number 3... the Devil!
Behind door number 2... You-Know-Who!
Track Name: 20170525 - Worth A Damn
I would thread you
if you needed to mend.
I would bend low
if you need a step to ascend.

I would make sure you knew you were worth a damn.
I would make sure you knew you were worth a damn.

I would let you be
when you needed to hide
like a seed.
I would always try
to lightly reach you
when you were deep away
behind your eyes
in some darker place.

I would make sure you knew you were worth a damn.
I would make sure you knew you were worth a damn.

When you are crawling out of your skin.
I would let you in.
When you are crawling out of your skin.
I would let you in.

I would know you
like I remember the lines
to a favorite song.
I will find you
when you seek to be sought.
I don't know it all,
but I can be taught.

I would make sure you knew you were worth a damn.
I would make sure you knew you were worth a damn.

When you are crawling out of your skin.
I would let you in.
When you are crawling out of your skin.
I would let you in.

I would make sure you knew you were worth a damn.
Track Name: 20170526 - Rose On A Grave
The fury of romance
where hope is still welcome
before the fingers of young love
once broken numb.

The fury of sadness
glowing in the blackest
midnight of wild rivers
we entered in backflips.

Lay your head on my lap
like a rose on grave.
You're such a babe,
but nothing can save me now.
Nothing can save me now.

The fury of feelings,
like worms, like buildings
like long gray arms,
or hopeless car alarms.

Lay your head on my lap
like a rose on grave.
You're such a babe,
but nothing can save me now.

I've sharpened this rusty knife
til I wore it away.
You're such a babe,
but I still can't put it down.

Nothing can save me now.
Track Name: 20170527 - Between These Roofs
I thought I was helping you,
but i was just staggering through
your dream.
Your dream.

The pictures fell off the wall.
Dollar bills wallpapered the hall,
so green.
So green.

You’re a coin glued to the ground,
and I am fresh blood in your mouth,
so sweet.
So sweet.

Imagine all that’s missing from a shadow,
from the 3D thing that cast it that we can’t know.
We want to connect.
We want to be close,
but if you jump between these roofs you won’t make it.
So when someone offers you their shadow, you should take it.

We want to connect.
We want to be close,
but if you jump between these roofs you won’t make it.
So when someone offers you their shadow, you should take it.
Track Name: 20170528 - Sunday Prayer, ccclxxxv
Time & time again,
I'll grant you, if the veins in my arms
were wires copper and color-coded
and my mind a gun you loaded
and my heart an alarm clock blaring
talk radio, those maniacs baring
opinions like beat dogs flashing their teeth
at children, or mailmen, or little old me,
I am. I am

Time & time again,
and if my bones were metal joists
and my feet cinder blocks, the claws
of cranes my hands, and these thoughts
that clamber on construction crews
under drunken foremanship confused
only then might I be the servant you hope
could swallow their soul and not choke,
I am, I am.

But you're a birthday, deep with the dayshine.
From dusk to moonbreak, the dust of keepsakes.

Time & time again, I am, I am.
Track Name: 20170529 - A Song I Can't Sing
The day is a song
I can’t sing.

No gain, no pain.
It’s alright not to try.
Eat and sleep, rinse, repeat.
You do your thing, then you die.

The day is a song
I can’t sing.
Life is a gift
I didn’t bring.
People are such poetry
I didn’t write,
and love a riddle
I can’t get right,
and it’s a scarier thing
than even wedding rings.
The day is a song
I can’t sing.

No gain, no pain.
It’s fine to just get by.
Eat and sleep, rinse, repeat.
Why be brave
if you can close your eyes?

The day is a song
I can’t sing.
Life is a gift
I didn’t bring.
People are such poetry
I didn’t write,
and love a riddle
I can’t get right,
and it’s a scarier thing
than even wedding rings.
The day is a song
I can’t sing.
Track Name: 20170530 - When You Arrived
I was gone when your mother wasn’t very far along.
A fool being a fool, driving around from town to town
pretending to be free, on no one’s team but me,
and you were the star I couldn’t see through the half-moon of that dream.
I was a balloon on a needle, and I cradled all of that fear.
Here was this blooming light, and I was playing the idiot deer.
And though I’m ashamed for you to know any of that part,
know as soon as you showed up, little lady, you had all of my heart,

once my world wound and my lightning ground
and my stones turned and my blisses burned
and my wish washed and my fool got lost
and my walls climb and my words rewind
and my list hit and my curtain splits
and my rose glowed and my rainbow chose
and my days braked and my lovers faked
and my bombs swanned and my enemies bond
and my belle balled and my toss got called
and my dice danced and my cancer pranced
and my clock tocked and my waves got rocked
and my dark sparked and my thunder barked
and my sky dived and my blue eyes cried
for joy when you arrived,
for joy when you arrived.
Track Name: 20170531 - The Feelings Machine
I watch myself live from an iota away,
jarred in my skull as every word takes shape,
but it’s like a computer decides the things that I say,
like some city in Europe where the all roads are one way.
I remember that one fight we had when you got so mad
you punched through the window behind the sink with your hand.
The water was still running, and you crumpled to the floor
and hid your head as you were screaming at the cabinet door.

The feelings machine.
The feelings machine.
That which takes pain, not gasoline.
The feelings machine.

It was insane. It was honest-to-god insane.
But then again what is insanity but animals in pain?
Its like that, like magic, how the glass falls.
It seems random, but it’s not magic at all.
In our bones as we picked up the shards
we knew however they fell, very near or very far.
There is nothing we could have done differently.
The sun simply burns, never harder or more gently.

The feelings machine.
The feelings machine.
Joy and esteem and jealous hopes and dreams.
The feelings machine.

And the world turns, and we love and then it ends.
Did you have to get used to sleeping alone again?
I did. And if I’m being honest it still feels strange.
I know it’s good for me, but I don’t like change,
the weird teeth of the corpse-eater called time.
The water is still running in the sink of my mind,
and I walk on that glass every single day,
because why pick up what you can’t put away?

The feelings machine.
The feelings machine.
That which takes pain, not gasoline.
The feelings machine.
Track Name: 20170601 - From Gray To Gray
While the night is piling up
like red wine in a paper cup,
our bodies like apartments
we’re tired of living in.

I’m a dreamer. You’re the dream.
You’re a scheme. I’m a schemer.
In-between all the sobbing
of the wind.

And even still I keep dreaming.
The water is so cold I put just my feet in.
Soon the birds will all
be asleep.

You’re a flame. I’m your biggest fan.
I put my whole heart in your hands,
but the hole there I didn’t see
was too deep.

And the sun starts to rise
like a tree between two gravesites
for the dead I couldn’t save
in my mind.

The light turns from gray to gray.
The gray cars go, and they wait,
and the grass is always grayer
on the other side.

Everyone sells their soul once in their life,
but God help you if you gotta sell it twice.
& if you don’t have love, the fire in your soul
will either quietly go out, or burn out of control.
Track Name: 20170602 - What Is Underneath?
Who's in there hiding,
stone in a crystal gown?
Who is behind me
buried in the wrist's ground?

What's underneath?
What is underneath?

What is inside me,
stone in a crystal gown?
Who is behind me?
I am too scared to turn around.

What's underneath?
What is underneath?

Cover me in darkness.
Cover me in darkness.
Cover me in darkness.
Cover me in darkness.
Cover me in darkness.
Cover me in darkness.
Track Name: 20170603 - Before You Go
Wish I could turn back time.
Wish I could change your mind.
I've fell before down heaven's stairs.
Some mistakes you don't care to make twice.

I'd love to see you.
I'd love to see you
before you go.
Before you go...
It's one thing to meet you.
It's one thing to meet you,
and another to know
just before you go.

If the Sun is shining where you are
and it's night for me,
then when I look up at the moon,
it'll be your light I see –
light that was too bright when you were near,
but I only notice the cage when you’re not with me in here.

Wish I could turn back time.
Wish I could change your mind.
Wish I could count the laughing lines
that bloom at the corner of your eyes,
with you body tight to mine,
like an ace you were palming to hide.

I'd love to see you.
I'd love to see you
before you go.
Before you go...
It's one thing to meet you.
It's one thing to meet you,
and another to know
just before you go.
Track Name: 20170604 - Sunday Prayer, ccclxxxvi
Time & time again,
I took the knife with the pearl handle
which hangs over the workbench
between the pliers and the crescent wrench
and went to meet my friend
at the treed cliff where his fence ends
because below there was a woods
where grownups don’t but children could,
i am, i am

Time & time again,
down there we were the guests
like the pets were in our homes,
things from another world alone.
There a knife was like catpiss on a couch,
like mad barking our happy shouts
as we made our way down,
& in some ways, never came out.
I am, I am.

But you’re a birthday, deep with the dayshine.
From dusk to moonbreak, the dust of keepsakes.

Time & time again, I am, I am.
Track Name: 20170605 - Thing Of Beauty
You take the high parts. I will take the low.
No one should have to play heart and soul alone.
We are looking for things to make us both go boom,
a door between the bedroom and the living room.

Could something as heavy as all the cares of the world
be by your hand in mine made light?
Could something so big as my mountain range of dreams
somehow fit in this small kiss goodnight?
Thing of beauty.
Thing of beauty.

I’ll be with you when it’s nothing but the rain,
and after when the dark clouds are traveling away
under spun stars of the wobbling galaxy wheel
and in our hearts now just remembering how to feel.

Could something as heavy as all the cares of the world
be by your hand in mine made light?
Could something so big as my mountain range of dreams
somehow fit in this small kiss goodnight?
Thing of beauty.
Thing of beauty.

I’ll be with you when you take from the middle your half.
I’ll be with you when the riddle’s answer is to laugh.
I’ll be with you at the treetop in the lightning storm
when the sky is too bright and the wind is too warm,
the branches curling in like a spider newly dead,
as if it’s trying to catch its soul the moment it is shed.
You got the hammer, honey. I got the nails.
Bring in the breezes, baby. I will be your sails.

Could something as heavy as all the cares of the world
be by your hand in mine made light?
Could something so big as my mountain range of dreams
somehow fit in this small kiss goodnight?
Thing of beauty.
Thing of beauty.
Track Name: 20170606 - Dark Circles
Dark, dark circles.

I was lost,
walking in circles,
when this strange stranger spoke
in his blues and his purples.

Walking in dark, dark circles.

Tromping around and around and around
through the slush of the clowning crowds.
There was a muffled warning,
as if a plastic pillow were the downtown.

Walking in dark, dark circles.

"Who is speaking," I asked,
"like a flower beneath towering weeds?
Is it the gone me once full
who haunts this thing now leaking,"

Walking in dark, dark circles.

"like some bat in its living room,
flying insanely around it,
the words waving like a broomstick
until the black blur is grounded?"

Grift gifting
sweet little
sleep thief.
Sleep thief,
you give me

Dark, dark circles.
Dark, dark circles.
Dark, dark circles.
Dark, dark circles.
Track Name: 20170607 - Two Days Between Sunday And Monday
Give me two days between Sunday and Monday
for the brakes to bleed,
to take a breath that isn’t one closer to death.
I need to true the wheels that carry me.

Give them a flower;
they’ll take the land.
Give them the finger;
they’ll take your hand.

Give me two days between Sunday and Monday
to pull from the dawn
swan after swan for my lover’s pond.
And if they go too deep or stay too long

Give them a flower;
they’ll take the land.
Give them the finger;
they’ll take your hand.
Track Name: 20170608 - Be You, Beautiful
Go.
Golden.
Golden chain.

No.
No good.
No goodbyes.

And under no condition,
absolutely no tears.

You’re made of matches, and so am I.
You go find your firefly,
and I’ll find mine.

Don’t.
Don’t be.
Don’t be weird.

Be.
Be you,
beautiful.

And under no condition,
absolutely no tears.

You’re made of matches, and so am I.
You go find your firefly,
and I’ll find mine.
Track Name: 20170609 - Your Lightning
We thought the sunflowers were just lovely
when they first appeared in the front yard.
But as they multiplied their leaves grew sharp
and their stalks unkindly hard

What if I change my mind?
Could your lightning strike the same place twice?

It is like that when you get loved more and more
and more than you think you deserve.
You want to swerve into that oncoming lane
but you always lose your nerve

What if I change my mind?
Could your lightning strike the same place twice?
What if I change my mind?
Could your lightning strike the same place twice?
.
In autumn the crows came to take
the yellow crowns and leave us only stems.
You watched from the window when
they flew away and I followed them.

What if I change my mind?
Could your lightning strike the same place twice?
What if I change my mind?
Could your lightning strike the same place twice?
Track Name: 20170610 - Hidden In Me
I would bow.
I would bow down
and give you all my power,
and give you all my power,

but I can’t fly.
I can’t get past
the edges of my island,
the edges of my island,
island.

There is a hell.
There is a heaven
hidden in me,
hidden in me.

Hidden in me.
Hidden in me.

I will cry.
I will cry out,
“there’s no line between shadows.”
There’s no line between shadows.
Shadows.
Track Name: 20170611 - Sunday Prayer, ccclxxxvii
Time & time again,
when I’m happy most of the time, I feel
like I’m stealing from a department store waiting
for someone to yell as I walk through the door,
“stop right there!” as the alarm starts to mewl,
and it’s like it’s this hundred pound jewel –
I’m gonna have to drop if I wanna get away.
Point is, you want to be happy, you gotta pay.
I am, I am

time & time again.
But I don’t mind the working for it,
and the truth is: I don’t even mind money.
It’s not really evil, per se. It’s like honey.
A busy bee will sting the hell out of you
if you get your nose too close to the loot.
I just hope he don’t forget the flowers
while he’s all tallying up his hours.
I am, I am.

But you’re a birthday, deep with the dayshine.
From dusk to moonbreak, the dust of keepsakes.

Time & time again, I am, I am.
Track Name: 20170612 - Stay Home
I am home.
And now that I am back
I finally understand

why they said don’t go.
There’s a part of you here
you’ll miss in distant lands.

I am home.
And now that I am back
I finally understand

But soon,
but soon,
will I forget again –
the floor forgets the dancer
like the sky forgets the lightning.
– or will I do the right thing
and stay home?
Track Name: 20170613 - Goldilocks
You got looks, especially in the dark.
You squint your eyes and give whiskers to the stars
and the stoplights
as you’re speeding to your bars,
as you’re waving your arms out the windows rolled down
with the radio louder but you’re still singing pretty loud.
You’re so alive,
like a bull mid-charge.

Goldilocks,
you smiles for blocks.
For miles you got luck.
Gold don’t give a fuck.

Two dollars and twenty-seven cents.
As long the day, so short the dress.
Miss America,
you look like a mess.
Walking down the street at 11AM,
nobody’s gotta ask we know where you been.
Quite the comedian
and the alchemist,
who laughed the lead of war into this,
who stripped us all but our shadow with a kiss
that was diseased
with idiotic bliss.

Goldilocks,
you smiles for blocks.
For miles you got luck.
Gold don’t give a fuck.
For miles you got luck.
Gold don’t give a fuck.
Track Name: 20170614 - Bet It All
A bird is going through the garbage
when the first of the big rains come.
And all you want is another shot to be in
like a pill on the whole world’s tongue.
But you are not gonna be famous,
no matter what your little girlfriend says.
Boss, I hate to be the one to break it to you,
but the good ones always get away.

When they say what they want for your life,
what you know in your heart that you don't,
don't bet it all. Don't bet everything you have.
Don't bet it all. Don't bet everything you have.

The worms are taking up a collection.
They are passing the doom hat around.
Fill it full of souls – men and animals alike.
Ashes. We are all fall down.
Where it is we all are going,
they don't care if you show up late.
Kids, we will get there when we get there,
smack dab inbetween fat chance and fate.

When they say what they want for your life,
what you know in your heart that you don't,
don't bet it all. Don't bet everything you have.
Don't bet it all. Don't bet everything you have.
Track Name: 20170615 - Hollow Body
It began and the clouds peeled back
like a curtain over a queen-size crater.
The air conditioner is wasted on her.
Like ice on a fire, my doomed creator.

Fare thee well, hollow, hollow,
fare thee well, hollow body.
Fare thee well, hollow, hollow,
fare thee well, hollow body.

The sun balanced on the far black trees,
like old men, once soldiers, who leave
in lines of ones and twos and threes.
Make way for them. Make way for me.

Fare thee well, hollow, hollow,
fare thee well, hollow body.
Fare thee well, hollow, hollow,
fare thee well, hollow body.
Fare thee well, hollow,
fare thee well, hollow body.
Track Name: 20170616 - Shivering
Like a river that’s becoming the sea,
I became you when you came into me
in your little apartment on Houston and B,
where you taught me about shivering.
Where you taught me about shivering.

Shivering.
Shivering.
Shivering.
I’ll teach you about shivering.

The sexton had a son, and when he turned twelve,
it was time to show him Heaven and Hell.
The difference, he said, it can be hard to tell.
That’s why I’ll teach you how to ring them bells.
That’s why I’ll teach you how to ring them bells.

Lights out at the madhouse. We were looking for dust.
All the shadows in the desert, I don’t know which ones to trust.
I know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy, I guess
who likes to mix a little no with yes.
Who likes to mix a little no with yes.

Shivering.
Shivering.
Shivering.
I’ll teach you about shivering.

You know how it goes these shambolic days.
They’d arrest the wind if it was blowing the wrong way.
They’d dig your grave and misspell your name
before they’d teach you about shivering.
Before they’d teach you about shivering.

The system got the horses.
The system got the knives.
The system got it’s own poison tongue
up the asshole of its own mind.
Up the asshole of its own mind.
Track Name: 20170617 - Easy Come, Easy Go
She collected feathers, because she was once told
that a feather on the ground is a word you don’t know.
And if she found enough of them, he said he’d fashion her wings,
and she could leave to live with him in Chicago.

Easy come, easy go.
Easier said than done, I know.
Easy come, easy go.

Coiling the cord around her arm, looking at the rain on the window,
spinning a quarter on the table while talking on the phone,
she would sing these little songs to him. And through the wall
and door and down the hall, we all hung on every note.

Easy come, easy go.
Easier said than done, I know.
Easy come, easy go.

Hers was one of those that made us all once more believe,
like a hole in a tin lid so captured butterflies can breathe.
But it all ended up hollow as last year’s cocoons.
They’re fragile and won’t last long unless you set them free.

Easy come, easy go.
Easier said than done, I know.
Easy come, easy go.

I found this little Guadalupe statue at the store
for a dollar, and the glow-in-the-dark one just a dollar more,
and I didn’t want to bother her, things being what they were,
but when I moved out before I left I put it by her door.

Easy come, easy go.
Easier said than done, I know.
Easy come, easy go.
Easy come, easy go.
Easy come, easy go.
Track Name: 20170618 - Sunday Prayer, ccclxxxviii
Time & time again,
peering over the tessellate past,
like a stone skipped down a waterfall,
to before there were pictures to put on my walls,
to when solemnly I sewed my hand to your heart,
the painlit needle’s path well-charted,
but strange, like swallowing small portions of gold,
or sleeping on steps up churches of old,
I am, I am.

Time & time again,
while the rest find some kind of ceiling and stop,
how much farther some would venture to pop?
Dawn by dawn, drop by drop,
the love like some taxi following me
turn for turn home, parking across the street,
lights off a block down. Is it there in the morning?
No need to look, sweetie. It’s a sure thing.
I am, I am.

But you’re a birthday, deep with the day shine.
From dusk to moon break, the dust of keepsakes.

Time & time again, I am, I am.
Track Name: 20170619 - The Costume
I have been drunk on every thing in every dump there is or ever was to be tried.
You’re not gonna find a cold shoulder I haven’t leaned on to cry if you try.
There isn't a circus in town that hasn’t asked to book you.
There isn't a hole in your whole house somebody ain’t looked through.

You seem so true,
and I’m so blue.

It all seemed too perfect, which catch is the hitch?
Were her hands controlled by pulleys; her kiss by a switch?
Was the laugh a recording? If I pull some string…?
Is the smile painted on? Is her wink on a spring?

Is it a costume you wear?
Is it a costume you wear?
Is it a costume?
Is it a costume?

I can’t tell which eye is real, and which one is glass.
All I’m asking is don’t write me a check I can’t cash.

Don’t open my veins,
unless you let me do the same.

Is it a costume you wear?
Is it a costume you wear?
Is it a costume?
Is it a costume?
Track Name: 20170620 - Mr. Money Man
Mister money man. Mister money man.
Mister money man. Mister money man.
Mister money man. Mister money man.

Mr. money man, the lowest clouds are the ones fullest of rain.
You see, a cup can only spill what if anything it contains.
But until the trickster mixed my words into a wish I never wished,
I had held the wild rivers and the winding roads within a fist.
From the highest cliff into the coldest water I had jumped,
and I had dropped down to my knees on the surface of the sun.
i have run with the devil on my back to the cracked lips
of the volcano at the bottom of the ocean’s deepest pit.
I have sang along with songs the human ear cannot hear,
and I have fallen like a star from a child’s lonely tear.

Mister money man. Mister money man.
Mister money man. Mister money man.
Mister money man. Mister money man.

Is it better to speed a hundred million miles down a track,
or be for an eternal second a twirling bird before the crash?
When you look up at a tree, do you see telephone poles
decked with dead wire? Do you look at the sky and see a hole?
Like caring more for the box than the present inside,
like only loving the music once the musician you love has died,
follow the lucid roots, the distractions and the antidotes,
the killdeer and the catbird, where the anorexia of the soul
is without end painting the dead rose bright red again
with a soft crooked cock dipped in the blood of better men.
I have made my bed and bets, but this worthless coin never lands.
It just spins in the air like wings of a butterfly in your hands,
the deft hands of a juggler, with the whole world up for grabs.
Your next breath becomes your last, and your eyes turn to glass,
and your spirit, light as a crystal feather worth a hundred grand.
What in death will you miss the most? You better miss the money, man.

Mister money man. Mister money man.
Mister money man. Mister money man.
Mister money man. Mister money man.
Track Name: 20170621 - Within Without A Doubt
People change
in every way
every day.
You’re not the same
within, without
a doubt.
Within without
a doubt.

We all get hurt
and let down.
We’re all too quiet,
all too loud,
to hear the close
and distant sound
within, without
a doubt.

You know that she means
the whole world to me,
and I’m trying to be
a promise worth keeping.

Within without a doubt.
Within without a doubt.
Within without a doubt.
Within without a doubt.
Track Name: 20170622 - The John Doe
Into the snow and the ash
of the static in the TV,
you wanted me to disappear.
You said, I could make this easy,
if I could not be around every corner,
at the far seat of every bar,
in the wings of all your stages,
in the trunks of all your cars.

Fifteen meters down
and five miles around,
they had to drain every drop
when the John Doe was found.
He’d been floating there a week –
a week of coffee and of tea,
a week of brushing teeth,
and every dish in DC
permeated with you,
like light trapped in a cloud.
Whoever it is you were
before your watery shroud,
they know you now.
They know you now.
They know you now.
They know you now.

They know you now.
They know you now.
Track Name: 20170623 - On The Roof Of Cottage
They let you name a star
for a dollar or two.
We found a good one
to name after you.

About this time every year,
we shed a couple tears
and drink a couple beers
for our fearless friend
on the roof of Cottage.

Next to Eridanus,
where the path was burned
by the wildest among us,
the one who never learned.

About this time every year,
we shed a couple tears
and drink a couple beers
for our fearless friend
on the roof of Cottage.

Adam took it the hardest
He still plays some of your songs
He even lived in your old room
but not for very long.
Even after they nova
that ghost of light remains
in everyone who remembers
and gives a star a name.

About this time every year,
we shed a couple tears
and drink a couple beers
for our fearless friend
on the roof of Cottage.
Track Name: 20170624 - One More Time
We all got a past
where we learn nothing lasts.
Over fifty percent
return from where they’re sent.
With odds like those,
it’s no wonder my no
gets the jump on my yes,
but I won’t give up yet.

I want to I want to I want to I want to try.
Just one more just one more just one more just one more time.
I want to I want to I want to I want to try.
Just one more just one more just one more just one more time.

You gotta pay to get in,
and to get out costs even more.
In some ways they’re lucky
who never find the door.
But you know what nature abhors,
and I got the space.
Maybe you could help me
to decorate the place.

I want to I want to I want to I want to try.
Just one more just one more just one more just one more time.
I want to I want to I want to I want to try.
Just one more just one more just one more just one more time.
Track Name: 20170625 - Sunday Prayer, ccclxxxix
Time & time again,
during monsoon season at church,
Natalie’s pastor would say a rainbow
was God making a promise, though
what for you weren’t meant to know,
the details like raindrops on a window –
crystal clear, but not meant to be named.
Responsible, but not meant to be blamed,
I am, I am.

Time & time again,
I think about friends of mine who died.
Was the rainbow they saw a lie?
Nick was twenty-one, Brian twenty-five.
I spent a long time hurt but not able to cry,
because I was still alive,
so it didn’t feel fair for me to despair,
because I am still here, and they are there.
I am, I am.

But you’re a birthday, deep with the dayshine.
From dusk to moonbreak, the dust of keepsakes.

Time & time again, I am, I am.
Track Name: 20170626 - Ride High Butterfly
I went without
saying goodbye,
before the rain
on the highway’d dried

all the way.
And the phone rings,
and it’s you and you say
just this one thing:

Ride high, butterfly.
Ride high.

The white flags
finally fly,
and the shots we fire
dive into the sky

and never come down
to the loveshook leaves
and the lovesick earth
that gave birth to me.

Ride high, butterfly.
Ride high.

Never come down!
Never come down!
Never come down!

Never come down!
Never come down!
Never come down!