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Q1 Keepers - Selected Songs From The Second Song Diary

by Paleo

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1.
Of all the stupid schmucks here getting drunk you asked me over a vodka, ginger ale, with a little lime and grenadine to identify the line where love is no longer worth fighting for, like a sign lighting up red in the dark over the door. Well, I say woe to those arriving in such armor to the dance. Heavy are the arms there holding weapons in their hands. It’s hard to feel somebody’s heart through a bullet proof vest, so if it’s come to this before with others, I’d suggest It’s true. You are the common denominator. It’s true. You are the common denominator. It’s true. You are the common denominator. It’s true. You are the common denominator. But I’m not saying that to gaslight you; don’t take it all yourself – the back and forth, the wave the sand, the swinging of the bell. It’s you or them, or a bit of both. Knowing only goes so far. You are you, and they are they, and I’m some idiot at the bar where the drinks no longer serve you, and the place will always close, and like tipsy trees dropping their leaves so too we drop our clothes. We are one hundred percent responsible only for getting it through our brain that everything is just exactly what you make of how you’re made. It’s true. You are the common denominator. It’s true. You are the common denominator. It’s true. You are the common denominator. It’s true. You are the common denominator.
2.
You’re star dust, so they say. Dust is old and cold, and stars burn, and never learn, and no one gets too close. Though you feel your flower fading, still you gotta wait. You know there's someone down the road... down the road. And you’ll never know unless you go. Stardust there they are. Though you feel your flower fading, still you gotta wait. You know there's someone down the road... down the road. You lovers are the living coal that keeps the machine moving, and you get pushed. You get pulled and crushed into diamond.
3.
Ask forgiveness, not permission. To words of wisdom i won’t listen. Just read my mind. My eyes glisten with pretty tears. Here’s your mission: Whisper. Whisper me sweet, sweet nothings, sweet, sweet nothings, nothings. Hear my heart. Start with silence. Explanations are a kind of violence. Just hold me close when the trial ends. i don’t need choirs or violins. Just whisper. Whisper me sweet, sweet nothings, sweet, sweet nothings, nothings. Sweet, sweet nothings.
4.
Namaste? Where’s the hole where you threw my heart away? How evolved of you to smile and say, "namaste." Give me all the dreamcatchers and crystals in the world covered in candle wax in the glow of rainbow light bulbs. Give me all the starling feather earrings ever worn, and burn it all. When did your headband become a blindfold? You hated the wind. I used to hold my coat out like wings and tell you to get in. I remember your eyes were so green, then for awhile they were yellow, and then they were red, finally. Namaste? I wanted so bad to see you, but why today? Why would you shake my hand and file me away? What’s it solve for you to smile and say, "namaste"? Give me all the dreamcatchers and crystals in the world covered in candle wax in the glow of rainbow light bulbs. Give me all the starling feather earrings ever worn, and burn it all. When did your headband become a blindfold? Was it all just a dream, some kind of commercial trying to sell you what you don’t need? Namaste? Where’s the hole where you threw my heart away? How evolved of you to smile and say, "namaste."
5.
The movie ain't over, but Amy's ready to leave. I got dropped off; your truck don't have the seats, so let her sit up front. You two go on ahead. I'm gonna stay; I want to see the end. From skin to skeleton, how does all this end, past screens and curtains, enemies and best friends. From skin to skeleton, how does all this end, past screens and curtains, enemies and best friends. & I walked by the dark horse after, but I didn’t go in. Out in this same rain, people getting pinned. Fireworks light even in weather like this. Nothing sparks in water better than a kiss. From skin to skeleton, how does all this end, past screens and curtains, enemies and best friends. From skin to skeleton, how does all this end, past screens and curtains, enemies and best friends. When I opened my eyes, Amy was on the edge of the bed, wearing the same clothes from the night before talking about the end. All the shapes a flame makes as it flickers in the fuel. Love doesn’t want to hurt you, it’s time that is cruel. From skin to skeleton, how does all this end, past screens and curtains, enemies and best friends. From skin to skeleton, how does all this end, past screens and curtains, enemies and best friends.
6.
The skull maraca filled with dreams and teeth and chariots and caca and fake dead flower wreaths. The beat breaks. The heart quakes. I shake before you the skull maraca filled with memories mad dashed on the rocks of time’s slow striptease. The beat breaks. The heart quakes. I shake before you the skull maraca shellacked in bloody pages that could not to Rorschach you, my smallest of cages. The beat breaks. The heart quakes. I shake before you the skull maraca. The skull maraca.
7.
I want to fly. I want to sing. But underwater, what good are wings? In every gutter the wine flows, and where it’s bound I go. Are you the moon? Am I a cloud? What is this wind all about that pushes me to you, this invisible ghost? Where it’s bound I go. What a dream we could be, if only our minds would let us sleep. And where the dream would take us I don’t know, but where it’s bound I go. I want to love. I want to touch. But my hands turn to dust. You looking for me? Follow the smoke. Where it’s bound I go. Where it’s bound I go.
8.
I am walking backwards. When i’m by your side I am going back in time through my life to when I was the blackbird waiting in the song. There was nothing wrong with my wings all along. Nothing broke that a smile can’t fix, yours always does the trick. Nothing sunk that won’t lift with a laugh. Be my be my be my be my be my be my be my be my Be my be my be my be my be my be my be my be my life raft, life raft. I am walking backwards. When i’m by your side I am going back in time through my life to when all that mattered was all the joy I felt all around when I was just a boy. Nothing broke that a smile can’t fix, yours always does the trick. Nothing sunk that won’t lift with a laugh. Be my be my be my be my be my be my be my be my Be my be my be my be my be my be my be my be my life raft, life raft. I am walking backwards. When i’m by your side I am going back in time through my life to when I was the master of being young, and happiness was my mother tongue. Nothing broke that a smile can’t fix, yours always does the trick. Nothing sunk that won’t lift with a laugh. Be my be my be my be my be my be my be my be my Be my be my be my be my be my be my be my be my life raft, life raft.
9.
I have no fear of winning, of putting my finger in the mouth of the game that ate your quarter. I’ll burn this arcade down. One of these days, you’ll get out of this town, and I’ll still be here, holding it down. I have no fear of fighting. I’d drink a cup of tears. If the crowd is getting hungry, you bleed to get their cheers. One of these days, you’ll get out of this town, and I’ll still be here, holding it down. I have no fear of dying. The angels keep their receipts. They can take me back whenever, and judge me by my deeds. One of these days, you’ll get out of this town, and I’ll still be here, holding it down. There are no tests that matter. I’m not afraid fail. I am no crazy captain. There is no white whale One of these days, you’ll get out of this town, and I’ll still be here, holding it down. I have no fear of loving. I’ll fire into that smoke and hope that I hit something that can take a joke. One of these days, you’ll get out of this town, and I’ll still be here, holding it down.
10.
At the end of the night when the day’s been a fight, I need something stout to knock me out. And sometimes the sheep need a field of good green before I go down for the count. But a woman’d be stronger A woman’d be stronger. A woman’d be stronger. I know. I know. And in the middle of the day when things don’t go my way, and I can’t let it go, deep down I know what the whole world must know when they look at all those balanced on the flagpoles roleplaying control. But a woman’d be stronger A woman’d be stronger. A woman’d be stronger. I know. I know. Walls keep you in, but that’s not real medicine. I know at least for me what sets me free. When a man lets his scars put him behind some bars, it’ll take more than steel to help him to heal. But a woman’d be stronger A woman’d be stronger. A woman’d be stronger. I know. I know. But a woman’d be stronger A woman’d be stronger. A woman’d be stronger. I know. I know.
11.
The Devil had a party when God had a Son. He said, "congratulations, buddy! Looks like you won. Finally, I'm gonna get something done. The Devil had a party when God had a Son. "Coo chee coo chee coo, cutie pie. You and I are gonna have some fun." You get the invite with directions to the house. It says once you’re in you’re in and you’re never getting out. There are three doors, it says, and you will have to choose. Depending on how look at it, no matter what you win or lose. Behind door number 1... the Devil! Behind door number 3... the Devil! Behind door number 2... You-Know-Who! The Devil had a party when God had a Son. Everybody put on your dancing shoes. Show him your moves. He'll play the drum. The Devil had a party when God had a son. Everyone is gonna be there or be square. The killers and the cops. The lecher and the nun. Behind door number 1... the Devil! Behind door number 3... the Devil! Behind door number 2... You-Know-Who!
12.
I was gone when your mother wasn’t very far along. A fool being a fool, driving around from town to town pretending to be free, on no one’s team but me, and you were the star I couldn’t see through the half-moon of that dream. I was a balloon on a needle, and I cradled all of that fear. Here was this blooming light, and I was playing the idiot deer. And though I’m ashamed for you to know any of that part, know as soon as you showed up, little lady, you had all of my heart, once my world wound and my lightning ground and my stones turned and my blisses burned and my wish washed and my fool got lost and my walls climb and my words rewind and my list hit and my curtain splits and my rose glowed and my rainbow chose and my days braked and my lovers faked and my bombs swanned and my enemies bond and my belle balled and my toss got called and my dice danced and my cancer pranced and my clock tocked and my waves got rocked and my dark sparked and my thunder barked and my sky dived and my blue eyes cried for joy when you arrived, for joy when you arrived.
13.
Wish I could turn back time. Wish I could change your mind. I've fell before down heaven's stairs. Some mistakes you don't care to make twice. I'd love to see you. I'd love to see you before you go. Before you go... It's one thing to meet you. It's one thing to meet you, and another to know just before you go. If the Sun is shining where you are and it's night for me, then when I look up at the moon, it'll be your light I see – light that was too bright when you were near, but I only notice the cage when you’re not with me in here. Wish I could turn back time. Wish I could change your mind. Wish I could count the laughing lines that bloom at the corner of your eyes, with you body tight to mine, like an ace you were palming to hide. I'd love to see you. I'd love to see you before you go. Before you go... It's one thing to meet you. It's one thing to meet you, and another to know just before you go.
14.
A bird is going through the garbage when the first of the big rains come. And all you want is another shot to be in like a pill on the whole world’s tongue. But you are not gonna be famous, no matter what your little girlfriend says. Boss, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but the good ones always get away. When they say what they want for your life, what you know in your heart that you don't, don't bet it all. Don't bet everything you have. Don't bet it all. Don't bet everything you have. The worms are taking up a collection. They are passing the doom hat around. Fill it full of souls – men and animals alike. Ashes. We are all fall down. Where it is we all are going, they don't care if you show up late. Kids, we will get there when we get there, smack dab inbetween fat chance and fate. When they say what they want for your life, what you know in your heart that you don't, don't bet it all. Don't bet everything you have. Don't bet it all. Don't bet everything you have.
15.
Into the snow and the ash of the static in the TV, you wanted me to disappear. You said, I could make this easy, if I could not be around every corner, at the far seat of every bar, in the wings of all your stages, in the trunks of all your cars. Fifteen meters down and five miles around, they had to drain every drop when the John Doe was found. He’d been floating there a week – a week of coffee and of tea, a week of brushing teeth, and every dish in DC permeated with you, like light trapped in a cloud. Whoever it is you were before your watery shroud, they know you now. They know you now. They know you now. They know you now. They know you now. They know you now.
16.
They let you name a star for a dollar or two. We found a good one to name after you. About this time every year, we shed a couple tears and drink a couple beers for our fearless friend on the roof of Cottage. Next to Eridanus, where the path was burned by the wildest among us, the one who never learned. About this time every year, we shed a couple tears and drink a couple beers for our fearless friend on the roof of Cottage. Adam took it the hardest He still plays some of your songs He even lived in your old room but not for very long. Even after they nova that ghost of light remains in everyone who remembers and gives a star a name. About this time every year, we shed a couple tears and drink a couple beers for our fearless friend on the roof of Cottage.
17.
I am driving toward Elden as the sun starts to rise on the very first day of the blessed rest of my life. The mountain is a blade that’s bearing down on the sky, strapped spinning to a wheel. It’s me throwing the knife. Every breath is a letter in the fuzzy tale of your life, by turns epic and dull, and at the end everyone dies. Omar said, “there is a door to which i found no key; there is a veil beyond which i cannot see.” He was describing the platform where you sit equal between the closing doors of the trains of your two wildest dreams – failed grails we quested for. When we got them at last near to our lips, they up and melted in our grasp. So I’m going up the mountain and I am never never never never coming down. Like a hair on the back of your head, I stood up for you. We were like plaster and mould; the dumb lucky few who knew what the man made of roses said to the man made of thorns, in whose bloodstreams we swam naked before we were born, where the waiter of fate served us his four winged cups: one of milk, one of sweat, one of wine, and one of blood. Now my flock of white birds is flying toward your red setting sun, with the road a long black ribbon underneath us undone. For this gift wrapped beneath it, our garden and our grave, the great bed where love, and death, is remade. Through the famished wall of memory do you still listen to the sex? Through the skylight look to death and wonder, “am i next?”? So I’m going up the mountain and I am never never never never coming down. Were you posing for a photo when they were taking a video? Did they ask you who you were? Did you tell the truth that you don’t know? You feel sorrow with the sorrower, and faith near the faithful. You prepared all the food, then you can’t sit at the table. You wrote all the songs, then got kicked out of the band. You know you shouldn’t bomb what you can kill with your hands. There is no faith without darkness. The blind asteroid is a slave to its progress, forward always into the void in the mold of starlight, the glory of the dead who sing and write and matter only in our heads. Shoot all those old corpse noble paintings into space. The Louvre would make a great fake mole for the Man in the Moon’s face So I’m going up the mountain and I am never never never never coming down.
18.
Sure as the shore is the door to the sea, you my adored could be the door to me, where I could dream and dream without the sleeping, and gonna love without the needing, both the candle and the match, the hook and the catch. You’re the ticket. I’ve been speeding. You alone pull me out of me. If I glow, it’s because you loaned me the energy. I alone pull you out you, until you shone through the hole I’ve been looking through. Somehow you and me became a we by human alchemy. Your name became like honey on my tongue. Among six billion, I count only one where I could dream without the sleeping, and gonna love without the needing, both the sun and the glasses, both the party and the midnight masses. You’re the ticket. Baby, I been speeding. You alone pull me out of me. If I glow, it’s because you loaned me the energy. I alone pull you out you, until you shone through the hole I’ve been looking through. Somehow you and me became a we by human alchemy.
19.
Under a waxing moon in the dead devil grass a sunflower swayed, and you waved a sparkler in the air and said you had spelled my name. But I saw something else there at the center of the falling sparks, while we waited for it to get dark enough for the fireworks to start. Their battlements of lawn chairs along a dirt path in a field wishing happy birthday and many more to their dead ideal. The coat of arms of many colors – ruby, emerald, and gold – shivering toward heaven. What’s dead never gets old. I wouldn’t say that I hate America. I’m just not it’s biggest fan. But the times I think I’m not fitting in here are times I probably am the perfect stranger, the perfect stranger, the perfect stranger, the perfect stranger in strangerland.
20.
Far from the orange hands of crosswalk signs, in the middle of nowhere, I felt home for once in my life. Let the river do the hurrying. Murder your worry. It’s summer. Tell her you love her. One way or another, you’ll try to make it last, even though everything burns so fast. It’s summer. Oh hopeful goddess of whispering fires, what a weakness. What a deepest desire. Let the river do the hurrying. Murder your worry. It’s summer. Tell her you love her. One way or another, you’ll try to make it last, even though everything burns so fast. It’s summer. Let the river do the hurrying. Murder your worry. It’s summer. Tell her you love her. One way or another, you’ll try to make it last, even though everything burns so fast. It’s summer.
21.
Lions and tigers and bears, or me? I know which one scares me most: the final frontier in my bathroom mirror, endlessly unknown Endlessly unknown. And were I moved to call your priest confess him all I done – with his too little cross for to hold all the lost – the man in the black would run. The man in the black would run. I just want to close my eyes now. I’m tired of staring this disguise down. But I know I’m all out of time outs. I just want to close my eyes now. Lions and tigers and bears, or me? I know which one scares me worst There are more doors in the mind than stars in the sky. Who knows which we’ll get to first? Who knows which we’ll get to first? And were I brave and I dialed you up, my tail between my legs, howling, “I was a beast!” (to say the least) would you finally let me pay? Would you finally let me pay? I just want to close my eyes now. I’m tired of staring this disguise down. But I know I’m all out of time outs. I just want to close my eyes now.
22.
Shake. Shake. Shake. Shake. You're getting up there. You're not getting any younger. Getting any younger. Getting old. Twenty-one: fun. So begun the out-and-out adventure, in springtime and summer and fall and winter, in every corner of the river, shining bright. You’re brand new. At twenty-two: voulez-vous. I wanted action in my twin bed. A little sin in the middle when I'm spelling out my business. Buy. Sell. What the hell. I'm tired of asking for everybody's permission. I thought love was free? Please. Twenty-three in a pear tree. I parted with my partridge family. They won't ever really understand me, sadly. It's like giving 3D glasses to the blind. Getting, getting, getting old. You're getting up there. You're not getting any younger. Getting any younger. Getting old. Everybody shake. Shake. Shake in the face of the grave. Shake. Shake. Shake. Twenty-four, no more true or false sensation of security in gated communities – what a narrow bow. And I am an arrow. And the bullseye is everything under the sky… Twenty five! (still alive) But the brightest light dances on the edge of a shadow, before you sink into sorrow thinking about how every breath is borrowed. How yesterday was once tomorrow. And that's a fact. Twenty six: speed trap. Rats racing the miles between who we are, marijuana piranhas, and who we want to be, shepherds of smoke towing trembling engines over back roads choked with lost souls stalling out and getting old. You're getting up there. You're not getting any younger. Getting any younger. Getting old. Twenty-seven. Heaven can be used as a weapon, where all the drugged out stars are using halos as tourniquets in the bathroom at the Big Dance, going stag over the mantel, smiling like pianos flushed into the sky. Twenty-eight? It's not too late to trick death as he picks flower and weed. So leave a trail of nails. Glue some quarters to the floor. Pull a fast one, because the only lap you needs to win is the last one. Twenty-nine: when you're out of sand. Man, you're probably also out of castles, with no shortage of assholes. The sheriff walks in and asks "okay, what's this all about?" I said "sheriff, it's about time!" You're getting up there. You're not getting any younger. Getting any younger. Getting old. You're getting up there. You're not getting any younger. Getting any younger. Getting old. Everybody shake. Shake. Shake. Shake.
23.
I’m not sorry. My apologies. When we walk the veins of the beast i.e. the city streets, what’s that make us? A virus? Or a floating rose of blood in a river of mud? I’ve had my fill for a lifetime of watching these locusts till sleepless this otherwise most glorious place, letting the demon sit on their face, the taste. These animals. Cutting the perfect reflection with their terrible rowing toward death and in that stirring I am not unscathed. I get carried away by their blood wave. My teeth grow long. My nails grow long. My breath gets fast. My heartbeat strong. The animal in me comes along, bone by bone, want by want, moan by moan. No longer am I alone beside the beast. Of the blood-stained glass window I am a piece. My flesh the nails. My bed the wretched cross. My embrace the thorny crown around the lost. Tongue by tongue, and need by need, I am not sorry, my apologies. You want to cum in my mouth? Well okay! Everybody come on. Or get out! You want to cum in my mouth? Well okay! Everybody come on. Or get out! You want to cum in my mouth? Well okay! Everybody come on. Or get out! You want to cum in my mouth? Well okay! Everybody come on. Or get out!

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To see the full Song Diary collection thus far, visit: paleo.bandcamp.com/album/the-song-diary-ii

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released July 16, 2017

All lyrics and music written and recorded on their respective days by David Strackany as part of the second Song Diary.

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